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Escape from Your Fears! A conversation with Michelle Poler by Luis Vicente Garcia

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Escape from Your Fears! A conversation with Michelle Poler by Luis Vicente Garcia

Michelle Poler on her TEDx Houston Talk

When you decide to start an important quest, there will certainly be many questions on your head. Could I do it? Will I fail? Will I succeed? How?

When I met Michelle Poler she had already embarked on what became her life project: Facing her Fears. And it has been transformational.

How many fears do you have? Some may be fear of failing, being rejected or not achieving. And if you think that way, you will never do.

If you are determined to finish strong you really have to get rid of your fears, even the simpler ones. This is what Michelle has taught us: you can Escape from Your Fears. As many have found, you can be afraid even of starting and taking action.

Performance is about Action, decisiveness, being fearless. This is what we will cover in this fearless show. Join me as I interview Michelle Poler as she talks to us about her 100 days of Fear, her new ideas and how she decided to take Action!
Michelle Poler with Luis Vicente Garcia

About Michelle Poler

Michelle Poler, originally from Caracas, Venezuela, is a graduate from the School of Visual Arts holding a master’s degree in Branding. A few months ago, she quit her job as an Art Director to develop what started as a school project and turned into a life-changing experience.

Earlier this year, Michelle decided to face all of her fears and record herself for her project 100 Days Without Fear. She planned to become a braver person by the end of the 100 days, what she didn’t plan was to inspire millions along the way.

Michelle Poler, Founder, 100 Days Without Fear

Hear this episode of “Performing at Your Best: Mindset Evolution with Luis Vicente Garcia” and many more On Demand anytime.

Dan Millman: Living On Purpose And Determining Your Life Path Number

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Dan Millman: Living On Purpose And Determining Your Life Path Number

Dan Millmanwpwcover

Millions have read Dan Millman’s books, Author of Way of the Peaceful Warrior (adapted to film by Universal Pictures),  he distills his powerful teaching through decades of exploration and experience into a concise map of what we’re here to accomplish in our life’s journey. For those at a crossroad or facing a challenge or change, listen in to take a quantum leap in self-knowledge, insight, and wisdom. The seeds planted will bear fruit for years to come. Learn how to determine your Life Path Number; a method for helping to clarify and fulfill your life purpose map by expanding your awareness of yourself and others.

If you missed this interview you can still listen at VoiceAmerica Empowerment: ‘You Are Not Alone -How To Rise Above Life’s Challenges‘ to hear the full episode.


More About Fear

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More About Fear


You will always have fear, but fear doesn’t always have to have you!

I can’t begin to tell you how much I am enjoying my show, THE POWER TO BE, on the Empowerment Channel each Thursday at 2:pm EST. Not long ago I did a show on Fear and the response was overwhelming. I wanted to offer you some more insights to understanding and learning to controlling your fear.

So, a question! Do you ever struggle with fear? If you are human, you do. Fear is the second most powerful enemy we face it life. It can:
➢ fill you with fright
➢ emotionally overwhelm you
➢ attack you from several fronts at the same time
➢ rekindle old fears you thought you have worked through

Here is what you have to understand – fear is an emotion that when it takes control of your life, it will paralyze you. Your mind knows no fear! Your mind knows adventure, dreaming, the freedom to soar to the highest aspects of living. Yet, when fear is stronger than desire, you will filter everything through the emotion of fear.

In my working with human behavior I have become aware that from the day a person is born until the day they day, they will wrestle consistently with 6 Fears. Now, the interesting thing is there is not a particular order. These 6 fears “just are” and arrange their place in your life depending on where you are in the situation you are facing. Also, at any given time one of these 6 Fears is the #1 challenge you are facing. When you can understand what the fear is and control it presence in your life, the other five diminish in their emotional ability to control you. If you don’t know your #1 fear, the other five will overwhelm you.

There are a few things I want you to remember:
1. Fear is an emotion your mind doesn’t understand.
2. You can control fear or fear can control you.
3. You can learn to control your fear.

First, Fear Is An Emotion!

This is critical for you to understand. Fear is an emotion that, when given control, can block your emotional path way to your brain. People look at me like I am crazy when I say, “Your mind knows no fear!”

Your mind is about resolving issues. When you are living from your “Mind-down,” you can control what is happening in your life, BUT (and it is a big BUT) when you are living from  your “Emotions-up,) your emotions will block your mind’s ability to handle what you are feeling, which makes it feel like your mind is engaged in the fear. Reality is, what you mind does when the emotion of fear is in control, is to work with you to calm the fear and show you the value in facing what you are feeling.

I met Bill at the conclusion of a presentation I was doing in Kansas City. I was on my way out of the room when I noticed him standing my the door. As I got closer, he stepped toward me and said, “What you said today about fear made sense, but I don’t think it is as easy as you make it sound to overcome fear. I have lived with fear my entire life and even with the help I have had, it still has control and overwhelms my life.”

“What have you done to learn to control your fear?”

“I haven’t been working on controlling it. I have been trying to get rid of it!”

“Bill, that’s your first mistake. Fear is an emotion. It is one of those anchor emotions that is and will always be a part of your life. You can’t get rid of fear! You have to learn to control it.”

“I hear what you are saying, but if I don’t get rid of it, it will always be there and can always come back.”

“Absolutely! The reason is, it is a part of your DNA. Fear will always be present, but it doesn’t always have to be something bad. When you learn to control your fear, you can take something we have always felt was a negative and turn it into a positive!”

I paused for a moment to allow him to catch up with me. I could tell by the look on his face, this was something new for him to hear.

“Bill, fear is an emotion that either controls you or you control it. From what I am hearing, your fear has always controlled you. Am I right?”

There was a long silence combined with a puzzled look on his face. “Yep, you hit the nail on the head. I have and do live in fear, because I am fearful of facing it.”

He paused, looked down and then continued. “If I am hearing your right, I can take this emotion, this fear, and learn to control it, and in doing so learn to control the fear.”

“You got it! The first thing you have to understand is fear is an emotion that is and will always be present in your life.”

Do you get what I’m talking about here? Fear is an emotion! If it stands alone the feelings it brings can overwhelm you and shut down your mind’s ability to show you the positive side of fear. If you understand, fear is an emotion, and if you don’t let the feelings fear travels with (like doubt, worry, uncertainty) you can open allow you mind to show you the value to the fear you are feeling.

Everything that comes to your life enters your life through one of two doorways into your personhood – your emotions or your mind. The entrance point creates the pathway the fear takes in your life. When you are living from your emotions up, you are giving the feelings that go with the situation the right to define what it means to your life. Since all emotions travel in threes, you are never dealing with just what you are feeling at that moment. Those feelings will reach out, grab other feelings and together form your definition of the event.

What do you think happens to you when fear attaches itself to doubt, worry and uncertainty? You are paralyzed and the creative pathway to allowing your mind to help you define how to resolve the event is shut down. That leave you with only your emotions to take control. Now, you are not in an emotionally healthy state.

When you are living from your Mind –down, you don’t see things the same as when you are living from your Emotions Up! When you mind is guiding the process, it is only looking for one thing – how to resolve and continue to move forward.

Is this an Aha moment for you? Can you see why many never get beyond their fear? It gets trapped in their emotional mixing bowl and just continues to spin and spin and spin. With each revolution it gathers a stronger emotional presence in your life. The fear can get so big, you can’t see through it, and the pathway to help, your mind, is completely shut out.

Fear is an emotion that either controls you or you control it! This you must understand and accept.

Second, Learning Your 6 Fears

Ok, from the day you are born until the day you die you will consistently wrestle with 6 Fears. Now, are there more fears than these six? YES, but in my years of working with human behavior, I have found these to be the top fears that shut the pathway to your mind down. These are the 6 that cause you to shut your eyes, react to what you are feelings and give them control of your life.

What Are These 6 Fears? In the following Chapters we are going to expose and examine these 6 Fears. Now, here is what you must understand. You have all 6 Fears! One of these 6 is your #1 Fear! When you find your #1 Fear and learn to control it, the other 5 will diminish. If you never confront your #1 Fear, the other 5 will nibble at your spirit and over a period of time destroy your desire to improve and leave you and emotional slave to Fear.

Ok, you ready? Let’s examine your 6 Fears and see what they are doing to your life!

Chapter 2:
If I do what I know I should do, it might take me out of my safe zone and put me somewhere I can’t control.

Most people want to feel two things in their life – stable and safe. This is why they create routines for their life. It makes things predictable and in that they feel safe, and with that comes the feeling of stability. Hey, they look at their life, don’t like what they see, but what they are seeing is more acceptable than steeping out of their secure zone and reach into a world filled with the unknown.

This routine is about sameness; it is about getting up and staying in familiar territory. For most this is how they define stability.

This is what makes the Fear of the Unknown so frightening. It means you have to leave your comfort zone, your safe ground. The challenge here is most don’t have the self-trust to step into the unknown. Without a strong foundation of self-trust, taking a risk is too big a gamble.

This is the person who lives with good intentions, writes goals they never achieve, have conversations about what they want their life to look like in 5 years. The truth is, they are all words! They would rather miss what their life could be, than step outside their secure prison.

Interesting, as I was writing this I got an email from Matthew. I have known Matt for almost 10 years. I met him at a program I was doing, have done mentoring with him and had him at my summer StarMaker Conference. When I first met him, it didn’t take long to figure out, “Matt was a person who lived in a little world, but talked about having a big space.” Watching his behavior (if you know me, you know my three little words that form my #1 human philosophy – Behavior Never Lies!), sent a clear message – Matt was all chatter and no forward action.”

Have you ever known a Matt?

His emails said, “I am setting here working on my goals for 2013, and as I was writing them, I realized something. These were the same goals I wrote for 2012 and 2011. I couldn’t believe I was simply rehashing what I had already talked about wanting to do with my life. What is wrong with me?”

Knowing Matt, I understood his struggle – Matt wanted something new while staying the same. His great fear is stepping out of his self destructive world into a world he can’t predict. He is trapped in his Circle of Sameness by his Fear of the Unknown! Can you relate to this?

Chapter 3:
If I do what I feel I should do, I might be left alone. I can’t be by myself.

How many people do you know who have stayed in an unhealthy relationship for the fear of not having anyone in their life. Sure they are no happy or feel loved or feel the relationship adds to their life, BUT they have someone there in their life. They exist in a pretend world and don’t deal with the reality the other person is just filling space, not a place in their life. The Fear of Being All Alone makes this an acceptable existence.

I wish you could have been in my office the day Mary came to see me. This was her third counseling visit, and she looked the same as on her last visit. Her eye was black; you could see the finger prints on her face where she had been slapped. Mary lived with a very abusive male. She walked in with her head down, and I knew she didn’t want me to see her face. When she looked up at me, she just started crying.

Chapter 4:
If I express what I am feeling, it could expose the fact I don’t know what I am doing. I don’t want to look like a failure.

For most, FAILURE has become one of those nasty words. It is like a permanent scar that never goes away. The challenge is that is the way “failure” has been taught. How many times has the statement been made “You don’t want to fail!” Or the statement, “Just fake it to you make it.” The idea of failing is a concept many can’t handle.

When they are confronted with the possibility of failing, they will either run away, find a reason why they shouldn’t be doing what they are doing or stop and start something else. They don’t understand that “failure” is simply a bridge that connects “success” and “defeat.” Failure is an option that didn’t work. It was a knockdown that you weren’t prepared for. That doesn’t make it a negative. In fact when you get back up, that is success! You fear failure because of your emotional programing.

Chapter 5:
If I do what I feel I should do, people may not like me. I need to be liked.

There is a strong need inside each of us to feel liked, feel loved. When that need is not being fed, there is fear. You start wondering, “What is wrong with me?” or “I must not be a loveable person!” or “I must be a bad person.”

All of these emotional feeling are there because we don’t have a strong foundation of self-worth. Over the years I have found any person who doesn’t have a strong foundation of self-worth is a candidate for feeling rejected. This fear causes them to give up their individuality and become a puppet others can play with. In that they feel accepted, and as dangerous as that is, it is made ok.

Chapter 6:
If I do what I feel I should do, it might cost me more than I am willing to pay.

With every thing you want to do with your life, there is price tag. You will only go as far in life as the price tag is acceptable. When the price tag is viewed as too big a cost, you will shut down and walk away. That price tag can be mental, emotional, spiritual, financial or physical. Whatever it is – if the price tag is seen as too big, you will walk away.

Chapter 7:
If I do what I feel I should do, I might get results I am not sure what to do with.

If might sound strange to talk about success being a fear, but it is! Have you ever known someone who got real close to what they said they wanted and implemented behaviors that sabotaged the situation?  That’s the Fear of Success!

Have you ever know someone who tasted success and then, didn’t do the things to keep it going? It wasn’t they didn’t know what to do; they were just fearful of what might happen if the success continued to grow. That’s the Fear of Success!

Chapter 8:
The Process For Controlling Your Fear

Have you ever watched a talented woman put her life on hold because of the fear she felt about what would happen to her relationship IF she really became successful? It wasn’t that she didn’t want the success; she just saw the cost of the success being too great. That is the Fear of Success!

Do any of these 6 Fears sound familiar to you? If you really looked at them, would any of them be a fear you struggle with? As I said earlier, from the day you are born to the day you die, you will struggle with these 6 Fears.

Now hear me say this – there is nothing wrong with fear as long as you own it and it doesn’t own you! Fear is, and that’s a fact. So, what do you need to do to control your fear? Here are 4 Keys To Controlling Your Fear.

Key #1: Face The Fact The Fear Exist
That is the starting point. For anything in life to improve it has to begin with “face what is.” This is where you admit the challenge you are facing. This is more than just admitting you have fear; it is understanding the fact the fear exist and has an emotional grip on your life. Denial doesn’t diminish the fear; in fact it strengthens its grip on your life.

So, start with Facing The Fact The Fear Exist!

Step #2: Examine and Learn Where The Fear Comes From
All the fear you face today comes from your yesterday. There is no fear in today! Why? Because today is just now being created. Your fear comes from a situation in your yesterday that opened the emotion, strengthened it with behavior and was never faced, SO it grew in its emotional size.

Fear is an emotion we attached to situations! The situation may not be the same one that originally created the fear, but something about the situation triggers an emotional surge back to that event. Then, all the emotions that were present then, race forward and connect to the new situation.

Step #3: Address The Situation That Originally Created The Fear
When the emotion of fear takes control, it redefines the landscape. You rewrite the event based on your fear, not necessarily the facts. When this happens, you understanding of the event now has a different hold on your life. You have to go back to the situation, calm yourself down and revisit what happened.

Step #4: Rewrite The Script From A Lesson Viewpoint
This is the turning point! This is where the fear can be repositioned as a positive part of your life. Within every situation your life has been through or been handed, there is a lesson that can turn it from a negative emotionally draining situation to a positive life altering experience where you are better because you have been through it. Anything that brings a lesson to your life becomes a positive part of your journey. When you rewrite the script you repave the emotional highway with insights you can implement into having a better life.


Scaling Up Your Business – The Do’s And Don’ts

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Scaling Up Your Business – The Do’s And Don’ts


When talking about business reinvention, we tend to focus on the big company’s need to rethink their strategy. The fact is that even young companies have to face the challenge of “transform or die”.

When a company is first started, it often focuses a lot on survival and how to find enough customers to sustain its business. Only 4% of the U.S. companies ever reach $1 million in sales. The few who

make it to the next phase soon realize that they have other challenges that are equally daunting, such as “how to scale up the company to meet the growing demand and navigate increasing complexity?” Leaders have to find new ways to drive and manage growth while making sure the organization that is growing in size is moving in sync.

The Don’ts

But are all businesses scalable? Juli Between, Managing Partner of Pivot Point Partners doesn’t think so. She pointed out on the Business Reinvention show that companies sometimes fail to scale up because they made the mistake of focusing only on products and not enough on building necessary infrastructure to support the growth, or favoring loyalty over performance. Good leaders understand the importance of diversity and don’t not just hire people who are similar to themselves.

At early-stage companies, the leaders often have to wear multiple hats and work on tactical issues. But as the company grows and new talents are brought in, the leader must shift their focus to develop strategic and system thinking while delegating more and more of the tasks to his or her team. This is one of the biggest leadership challenges I observe when working with fast-growing companies. Leaders who are unwilling to delegate could risk being too task-oriented and failing to see the big picture and set a long-term vision to drive growth. When leaders spread too thin, they slow down the decision-making process and prevent their companies from responding to the market change quickly. This often demotivates their best performers who are eager to help the company make the leap to the next level and hungry for new challenges. Leaders risk losing their best performers when they don’t delegate and give the employees the opportunity to grow by taking on new responsibilities.

The Do’s

1. Establish Key Performance Indicators – Having a scoreboard builds a great foundation for the leaders to communicate their visions, create alignment, identify opportunities and set priorities.

Betwee suggests that companies track financial indicators, customer satisfaction which includes customer adoption and retention, operations efficiency, technology performance and talent management. Because having great talent is the key to growth strategy, I also encourage leaders to review their leadership team and ask if they would rehire the executives – why and why not. This helps the leaders identify the organizational gaps as well as talent development needs.

2. Develop System Thinking – I once asked Craig Barrett who was the CEO and Chairman of Intel, how to keep a company innovative. “Get out of their way!” was his answer. It may sound over-simplified and counter-intuitive but it is in fact words of wisdom from an executive who successfully positioned Intel to be the market leader following the dotcom bust in 2000. This is particularly relevant to executives who are leading company transition from a small organization to a growth engine. As the company grows, the leader’s job is to make sure the company has the infrastructure to support business growth as well as talent development so the employees can do what they do best and focus on growing the company.

Leaders should shift from “telling to listening”, said Nanette Miller, West-Coast Partner-in-Charge at Marcum LLP who has worked closely with start-up and emerging companies. Listening to and learning from employees and customers help leaders develop peripheral vision to understand the overall market and company dynamics. Having system thinking is the key to developing strategic thinking and essential to creating a winning long-term vision for the company. Empower your employees to do the other tasks so you can focus on the big picture and not get buried in the details. Include your leadership team when working on the overall company strategy.

3. Hire Slowly and Fire Quickly – A good strategy only accounts for a small percentage of your success. What’s even more important is how well the strategy is executed, and having the right talent is the first step to ensuring successful implementation.

Great leaders know how to pick the right talent who shares the same values and can complement their own strengths and weaknesses. They “look for people who are better than they are but share a common set of values”, said Daniel Isenberg, Adjunct Professor at Columbia School of Business.

Many companies rush to hire new talent to cope with the increasing demand. Few take the time to craft a good job description and think through qualifications and qualities needed to succeed in the job. In some cases, companies fail to redefine the job and continue to use old job description after the role has evolved. If you don’t know what you are looking for, chances are you won’t find what you need.

Another challenge growth-stage companies may face is that they sometimes outgrow their employees. Some employees or leaders thrive in a small-business environment but struggle in a more complex organization. As the company grows, they are no longer the right talent for the jobs that they have been in. Sometimes an employee’s performance goes from good to bad because (s)he does not understand the changing need, or does not have the skills needed for the new role. The manager needs to step in and help develop new skills by providing coaching or training programs.

If the employee is not coachable or is not interested in the new skills or responsibilities, the company can offer job rotation opportunities to move the employee into a role that is more suitable for him. If there are no other opportunities for the employee, the company may have to consider letting the employee go. This is a very uncomfortable situation. Some leaders choose not to deal with the problem. Over time, the low performance affects the morale and efficiency, and creates a toxic environment. Instead of fearing the potential consequence of firing an employee, the leader must also consider the price the company has to pay for not dealing with the problem.

4. Strengthen Leadership Skills – Most discussions about growth strategy focuses on management skills and financial discipline. What’s also critical is for the executive’s capacity to  adapt to change and take on new challenges.

Developing a strong self-awareness is the foundation to great leadership, particularly in the time of change. As the company begins to experience growing pains, the leader has to be alert and sense when the old way of doing things is no longer effective. If the growth is changing your organization, it’s not hard to understand why the leader may also need to adjust themselves along the way, either their management style, the frequency of communication, or the way of they look at the market. Leaders have to tune in to the internal and external environments around them so they can be aware when the need for change arises. It also helps to work with an executive coach who help leaders see their blind spots and serve as a thought leader.

In addition to trust and team building, leaders should also hone in their skills to inspire others. In a fast-growing environment, the employees are often asked to do more with less so the leader must be able to communicate a compelling vision to motivate the team to work towards the goals despite lack of resources and certainty.

But most importantly, enjoy the incredible journey.  Scaling your business will not only teach you about leadership but also help you grow as a person.


About the Author: Nancy Lin  is an executive coach and a business consultant at Change Agent SF.  She is also the host of the Business Reinvention show on Voice America Business channel. She works with leaders at growth-stage companies to transform the way they look at their business and leadership. Nancy brings to her executive coaching and podcast a strong understanding of business, having worked for Yahoo, DHL, Johnson & Johnson and Pepsi. You can reach her on Twitter @BizReinvention

Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it By Richard Levy

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Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it By Richard Levy

challengeConsider today’s successful people. Are they smarter than you? Are they more deserving? Have they paid greater dues? Certainly not! However, they may be putting forth important life principles such that the Universe begins affirming them. These people are proof that anyone else can do the same. And the good news for you is that understanding these principles gives you the advantage. You have but to direct your thinking to direct your experience. How do you direct your thinking? Tune in as Lauren Archer, Health Coach, Cognitive Behavior Coach, Hypnotherapist, and Trainer explains how easy it is to overcome your challenges and limitations to create the life you desire.

Tune in now for Wealthy Thoughts new episode “Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it” on the Voiceamerica Empowerment Channel Every Monday noon Pacific Time also 2PM CST; 3PM EST, 1PM MST


Do you catch yourself thinking negatively sometimes? Do you carry around a lot of suppressed anger or envy towards others? If so, these thoughts could be holding you back from success without you even realizing it! “Wealthy Thoughts” with Richard Levy will empower you to live a more positive and prosperous life. Richard believes that there are certain thoughts and actions that attract wealth, while others repel it. During this show, Richard provides CLEAR and SIMPLE direction for anyone seeking a positive lifestyle change.  Our Topics include  releasing negativity, anger and abusive relationships, improving health, overcoming debt, following your life’s passion, attracting your dream job and/or soul mate, eliminating fears, the power of affirmations, and more. Listen for Wealthy Thoughts, every Monday at Noon Pacific Time on the VoiceAmerica Empowerment Channel.

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