Have you ever had a sense that it’s time for a big change? Many of us do, yet often it can seem too enormous to take that first step. You may put off change many times – perhaps thinking that it would just be too difficult or you will get to it someday when the children are older or you have more money at hand. And unlike someone who desires things to always remain the same, you have made smaller changes. Do bigger choices seem intimidating? . Perhaps it could be leaving a job you have outgrown, beginning or ending a relationship. Maybe you would like to move to a different country or begin a new business or even finish a college or high school degree. What if it didn’t have to be difficult or overwhelming? What if it didn’t mean working harder, longer and suffering to create an extremely different life for yourself? What if you had some profoundly powerful tools that could create a different reality with more ease than you have ever thought was possible? Join Heather Nichols and Blossom Benedict as they share some of their favorite tools create those big changes in life with ease, speed, a sense of joy, creativity and potency!
What am I going to write about? The time I struggled and showed my ass by behaving like I’d lost my mind? There are moments I feel like I’m part of the circus or better yet starring in a sit-com. My life is far from always being full of laughter though we laugh a lot in our family.
I get tired of taking everything so seriously. So I put on a pair of “TV glasses” and see what each situation I’m worried about, frustrated with, pissed about, and enjoying would like through the camera of a sit-com.
I discovered this solution when Eli was an infant. I was alone and changing his diaper. He stuck one foot in poop, then another, then his hand. Somehow it got on my hands too. I was by myself at home. And as a new mom, I began to panic. How do I figure this out? How do I get my son and myself clean without getting poop everywhere. Every idea I thought of resulted in me seeing my son ending up falling to the floor. All the tools I needed were in other rooms, The thought of carrying poop from room to room with a dog and three cats standing by to enter the fray filled me with more anxiety. My body tensed and tightened. And then Eli began to cry. Big surprise, right? And then as he wriggled in more poop, for a split second I imagined my reaction if I was watching this on TV. What was the big deal? And I began to laugh. And as I laughed and my body loosened, Eli calmed and smiled. I have no idea how, but somehow I cleaned us both pretty quickly and easily. And from then on, I pulled out my “TV Glasses” during life situations. Any caregivers out there ever experience similar situations?
Which brings me to a few days ago when again I was struggling, frustrated and a little scared. Instead of picturing the sitcom, I cried. I disagreed with my producer for my upcoming radio show and participated in unnecessary arguing drama. I was not fit for human consumption and I felt it in my body. I reflected on all my “life plates” I keep spinning, my to dos. Are these life or death “plates”? Nope. What will happen if I don’t get EVERYTHING done? Nothing. What am I afraid of?
Truth? Falling on my face which is FAILING. Yet even as I say that most of me is not afraid. I know in the deepest part of me, even if I fall on my face there is a reason. I know the experience will provide me with an opportunity. Now truth be told. It isn’t comfortable to fail. So I don’t know of anyone who runs out and says Yes, I’ll choose Failure. What I know is if I don’t choose change, which comes with risks, and pushing out of what is comfortable, I stay stuck.
Complacency becomes another word for stuck. Don’t make waves. Status quo. Don’t ask a tough question because of what might happen. Did you know stuck means you don’t get to experience the fantabulous either?
Self-esteem plays a huge role in your willingness to embrace change. Change can have ALOT of unknown and unfamiliar feelings and factors. So of course complacency will feel better in some aspects because you know it. And you know your outcomes even if they are painful.
So here I go taking another leap: 1) I premiered my radio show heard globally 2) I stopped part of my business marketing which I believed until recently was the largest draw for meeting new clients. I do not know what I’m doing next to grow my community. I trust it will be revealed soon (there was a bit of GULP the first time I said that) 3) I am continuing to lovingly detach as a parent (more on this in future articles). Providing my son opportunities to grow and fail (as safely as I can) 4) I am visibly emerging with live videos on social media, radio, joint ventures with other healers 5) I am learning how to do my radio show from my computer and all the mechanics and marketing (there are at least 10 things here I don’t know) 6) I am allowing in my relationship with Marc instead of listening to the voice telling me to “drive the train”. With more leaping each week and sometimes daily.
And while some days it feels harder and some days I fail. I am still happy everyday. And more and more consistently, I feel an ease and a joy. I feel a freedom like I did as a kid riding my bike super fast with the wind blowing my hair kicking my feet out as I went down a huge hill and yelling WHEEEEEEE!!!
With Love and Gratitude,
Iâve been having conversations recently with a friend. He truly wants to find and enjoy a long term committed relationship. His relationship experience is dotted with disappointment and hurt. He recently met someone new and they clicked.
In one breath, he tells me about their amazing connection. They enjoy spending time together, talking, intimacy, just hanging out. They’re very attracted to each other, yet it’s much more than physical. He spends a lot of time telling me about their connection in some detail. They have similar values, think similarly, yet they also have some differences.
Then he says âshe is a unicornâ. By definition a unicorn is a fantasy, âa mythical animal typically represented as a horse with a single straight horn projecting from its forehead.â He follows this up saying âshe seems perfect for me. There must be something Iâm not seeing. I keep looking for what’s wrong with her. She is too good to be true.â
Have you ever met someone amazing and thought that very same thing? âToo Good to Be True?â It could be with a relationship, a friendship, a job, the way your life is flowing. Anything.
I had a time when I felt this way too. It wasnât when I met and dated my husband. It was later AFTER we married. Weird, I know.
When you say âitâs too good to be true,â You’re questioning what is coming into your life because of your own lack of or limited belief in self-love, self-worth. You feel self-doubt which causes you to resist change, looking for “the other shoe to drop” effect, instead of embracing change.
Your limiting belief is two-fold (or more):
1) You’re missing some of the enjoyment of your relationship by focusing on some unforeseen problem (fear, anxiety) that may not ever happen. That is creating fear in you and causes you to âping pongâ. Yes, I am in. No, I am afraid. Yes, I am in. No, I am afraid. The ping ponging changes the magnetic energy around you as well as your behavior and it can feel confusing to someone else without them understanding why.
For my friend, it comes out in his relationship when they discuss their relationship histories. He wants to know, he doesnât want to know. Then he hears something that concerns him and thinks he may have found âthe other shoeâ, but he doesnât really want to find the other shoe. And then these feelings drape themselves over his girlfriend and she becomes sensitive and upset. Meanwhile he doesnât understand why she is upset. This can lead to drama, unnecessary drama, instead of enjoying each moment and the now.
2) What are you truly afraid of? Why do you feel you do not deserve this happiness and love? He has been hurt in the past. Does that sound familiar? He says maybe he isnât meant to be with someone. Which is as close to saying âmaybe I donât deserve to be with someoneâ, âmaybe Iâm not loveableâ. My friend has a harder time going to this place. That is so common. Who wants to sit in feelings of âIâm not worthyâ and âIâm not loveableâ. And yet, even not addressing them, they take hold in your life. And they can decimate your relationships if you engage or speak from lack.
When you have full love and belief in yourself, you stop resisting, surrender and embrace change. Then you move past the âis this really happening?; Is this real?; Is this something I deserve? And you just say…YES.
If you feel âit is too good to be true?â or you wait for the âother shoe to dropâ? What do you do about it? Do you do anything about it or silently suffer?
You can put an end to these silent and shared conversations. You can quiet your fear. It is so possible. I didnât always believe it. Through my own healing and the support and guidance I share with and teach to my clients, Iâve seen and experienced it.
And if you are ready to look at your life from a possibility of: anything is possible and life has many possibilities. I invite you to a complimentary call with me Touching Your Inner Guidance. Just click the link below and weâll talk about what you are done with and ready to leave behind; what you want for yourself and can so have; and how what I do can support and guide you to those extraordinary possibilities.
With the on-air Be the Star You Are!Â® youth reporters.
The Gift of Choice
Every week, Express Yourself!â¢ will bring you a stimulating program based on a chapter from our award winning book Be the Star You Are!Â® for Teens.
Life is about choices. We can choose to be happy, we can choose to be sad. We have the power. Host Henna Hundal examines the benefits of choosing a life of integrity, honesty, bravery, and empowerment, while inspiring others to do the same. Henna interviews two thrilling authors, Natalie Richards and Anita Telle.
Natalie is the author of the YALSA Teensâ Top Ten nominated psychological thriller, Six Months Later, and the newest thriller Gone Too Far. She discusses the choices she has made to live her passion as a writer and she encourages youth to go for their dreams.
Anita Telle has a mission: To teach acceptance and love to children ages 4 â 9 so they will grow up to be amazing, supportive and loving teenagers, immune to peer pressure and bullying.
Her recent book âThe Ultimate Anti-Bullying Solutions Guide: The Sure fire way to STOP Bullying NOW!â is a handbook for people who want to choose a positive solution.
Choice is a gift. Choose Wisely!
Born and raised in Central Ohio, Natalie D. Richards is the author of the YALSA Teensâ Top Ten nominated psychological thriller, Six Months Later. Â Publisherâs Weekly calls her newest thriller, Gone Too Far, ââ¦a gripping whodunit with a challenging ethical dilemma at its center.â Â With a career history in technical, legal, and business writing, Richards turned to fiction in her late twenties and hasnât looked back. Â A champion of aspiring authors, Richards regularly presents workshops to schools and writing groups. Â When she’s not writing or speaking, you can probably find her wading through the towers of dog-eared paperbacks that have taken over her bedroom.
Anita Telle is an entrepreneur, philanthropist, international award winning author, speaker and renowned childrenâs champion. She has a mission: to teach acceptance and love to children ages 4 â 9 so they will grow up to be amazing, supportive and loving teenagers, immune to peer pressure and bullying. She grew up in Norway, where storytelling is part of her culture. Drawing on that heritage, Anita started writing books for children with engaging stories.Anita has read her books to more than 1000 children. Inspired by the experiences of children, parents, teachers, and her son, Anita wrote âThe Ultimate Anti-Bullying Solutions Guide: The Sure fire way to STOP Bullying NOW!â www.anitatelle.com
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