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Dr. Romance tells us how to be FREE in a Relationship

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Dr. Romance tells us how to be FREE in a Relationship


How to Be a Couple and Still Be Free by author Tina Tessina is the perfect tool for designing and creating a relationship unique to your individual personalities and situation. With it, any couple can learn to work together to create a loving, sustainable, healthy, and equal partnership that you will treasure. Learn how to celebrate your differences with Love Styles.


Have you ever wondered what the last twenty years of your life will look like? You can design your future when you decide to adopt a positive aging attitude free of aches, pains, and rocking in a chair. Life is short. Write your blueprint today with a little help from coach Cynthia Brian

Do you think you are a morning person or do you have a hard time waking up in the morning? Despite the saying “the early bird gets the worm”, not everyone is on the same sleep/wake schedule. Knowing when you are at your best is critical to your health as well as to your productivity. Find your own personal rhythm.


Author Bio: Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D. (www.tinatessina.com) is a licensed psychotherapist in S. California since 1978 with over 40 years’ experience in counseling individuals and couples and author of 14 books in 17 languages, including It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of DysfunctionThe Ten Smartest Decisions a Woman Can Make After FortyLove Styles: How to Celebrate Your DifferencesThe Real 13th Step , How to Be Happy Partners: Working it Out Together and How to Be a Couple and Still Be Free.  She writes the “Dr. Romance” blog (drromance.typepad.com), and the “Happiness Tips from Tina” email newsletter.  Online, she’s known as “Dr. Romance” Dr. Tessina appears frequently on radio, TV, video and podcasts. She tweets @tinatessina


Listen at Voice America Network: https://www.voiceamerica.com/episode/105599/tina-tessina-how-to-be-a-couple-and-still-be-free


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When you are looking for upbeat, life-changing, and mind stretching information, you have come to the right place. Host Cynthia Brian takes you on a journey of exploration that will encourage, inspire, and motivate you to make positive changes that offer life enhancing results. It’s party time on StarStyle®-Be the Star You Are!®. And YOU are invited! Join us LIVE 4-5pm Pt on Wednesdays or tune in to the archives at your leisure. Come play in StarStyle Country.

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Does Improving Your Relationship Really Mean Changing Your Partner? By Dr. Suzanne B. Phillips

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Does Improving Your Relationship Really Mean Changing Your Partner? By Dr. Suzanne B. Phillips

When people want to improve their relationship, their first focus is often the changes their partner needs to make.  This blog explores the interesting ways partners see things differently.  Strategies are offered that invite ownership of the wish to change and ways in which changing self often impacts the partner and improves the relationship. Ownership of change can equate to improvement.

More Here!

What Are The Three Top Relationship Killers? Expert Opinions

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What do you think are the three top relationship killers?

About a month ago a relationship site contacted me and asked me that question. The Coordinator of the site said that they were gathering the opinions of people, like myself, who worked with and wrote about couples. In the end they gathered some fascinating and important comments from 62 experts.

Couple staring at each other

I would invite you to consider that when your relationship is working there is no one more expert about why it feels good, thrives and keeps you both happy and healthy than both of you.

When it is not working so well, reading the opinions and advice from those who have worked with couples may provide motivation to improve your relationship. It may shine a light on what is keeping you from being happy together.

Given everyone’s interest in “ online” answers, try using these opinions as interesting information that you can read together or read separately in a way that invites self-reflection, mutual consideration or even just something different to consider together. We never know where a first step might begin.

I have listed the three top relationship killers that I identified. I have also listed comments I have heard over the years. Below them you will find the link to 62 contributions by men and women, from matchmakers to mental health professionals who work with couples….

Three Top Relationship Killers


Distrust in a relationship disqualifies the safety needed for connection, intimacy and growth. Distrust may stem from a known or feared betrayal, which left unresolved and unaddressed, slowly eats away at all that is good. Distrust, which persists regardless of apology and change, may imply that mistakes and imperfections are not allowed.

  • Sure I made mistakes, but no matter what I did, the distrust was set in stone. You can’t feel good about your life together if you can never get past the mistakes, if you live in the past and never go forward.
  • From early on the relationship, I was never complimented or thanked. Was he afraid I would feel too good about myself, not love him anymore? I don’t know, but how can you feel love if you never feel appreciated?


Disrespect in a relationship disqualifies the necessary mirroring, affirmation and appreciation that nurture a strong bond. Disrespect disrupts the feeling of mutuality that enables couples to draw upon each others strengths, enjoy each others victories, fuel each others dreams, become each others fans.

  • She stopped asking for my opinion on anything. I felt marginalized so I started pulling back and ignoring her.
  • Other people were more impressed by my athletic strides than he was. Even the children wondered why he never came to cheer me on. When I asked, he said I was wasting our time. I felt embarrassed by his lack of support.


Disinterest is a deal breaker in a relationship. Most partners would rather have someone mad at them than disinterested. Disinterest is incompatible with passion, desire and intimacy. The disinterested partner has stopped listening, laughing, flirting or touching with interest and expectation. Sex may be possible but it is obligation, compliance or routine.

  • She just stopped being interested in any intimacy.  We never laughed. There was no more fun. Eventually connection stopped mattering.
  • I think it ended when the outside world became more important than each other. When the kids left for school we stopped even trying. We had become strangers.

Read on to 62 very interesting tips on what to avoid if you want to keep your relationship healthy and happy.

“A loving relationship is one in which the loved one is free to be himself (herself) — to laugh with me, but never at me; to cry with me, but never because of me; to love life, to love himself (herself), to love being loved. Such a relationship is based upon freedom and can never grow in a jealous heart.”– Leo F. Buscaglia

“Would You Even Join a Couples Therapy Group? An Insider Look” by Dr. Suzanne B.Phillips

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“Would You Even Join a Couples Therapy Group? An Insider Look” by Dr. Suzanne B.Phillips

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In this blog Host of Psych Up Live, Dr. Suzanne B. Phillips interviews Laurie Abraham author of ” The Husband and Wives Club” which describes her experience of being the observer of a couples therapy group run by Dr. Judith Coche for a year. The answers to Suzanne Phillips’ questions offer a fascinating insider look at the process, risks and benefits of healing your marriage in a couples therapy group.

Starting Over: Getting Past the Argument by Ariel & Shya Kane

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7th Wave

4/20/16 – Starting Over: Getting Past the Argument

Have you ever found yourself in one of those moods where no matter what someone says or does, it is all fodder for a fight? Join Ariel and Shya in Being Here and discover how to let go and start over.

Listen Live this Wednesday, April 20th at 9am PST / 12pm EST on the VoiceAmerica 7th Wave Channel.

After this Wednesday, you can stream or download this episode and over 400 episodes on a wide variety of topics from our archives here.

You can also subscribe to BEING HERE on iTunes!

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