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History is Made. Healing is Necessary. Have Hope!

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Empowerment
History is Made. Healing is Necessary. Have Hope!

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MIRACLE MOMENT®

“History says don’t hope

On this side of the grave.

But then, once in a lifetime

The longed for tidal wave

Of justice can rise up.

And hope and history rhyme.”

Seamus Heaney, Northern Ireland Theatre Company, 1990


MESSAGE FROM CYNTHIA BRIAN, Founder/Executive Director

Cynthia-purpleA new chapter in history was written this past weekend.

As of Sunday afternoon, Joe Biden had received 75.2 million votes, the most votes cast in a presidential race ever. Donald Trump had received 70.8 million votes, the second most votes cast according to the Associated Press. Our California Senator, Kamala Harris will break the 244-year ceiling-shattering barrier to become the first elected female vice president of the United States on inauguration day.  She is also the first Black vice president, first of Indian descent, and daughter of immigrants.

The joyful celebrations that erupted around the country confirmed that America was ready for change and stability. The past four years have divided our country like no other time since the Civil War. It has been a time of unpredictability, chaos, civil unrest, rising white supremacy, climate change denial, and wall building. 2020 brought the Covid-19 pandemic, unemployment, protests, depression, and death. The campaign was vitriolic and stress-inducing. With a new inclusive administration positioned to take charge, it is time to heal the wounds and soothe the pain.

It’s not going to be easy or swift, but I am encouraged by the fact that President-elect Joe Biden has already charted a course for policy changes and named a coronavirus task force.

Mr. Biden said that “with the campaign over, it’s time to put the anger and the harsh rhetoric behind us and come together as a nation. It’s time for America to unite. And to heal. The work ahead of us will be hard, but I promise you this: I will be a President for all Americans — whether you voted for me or not. I will keep the faith that you have placed in me.”

As challenging as the issues are that divide us, we will work together to build a better future. There is no place for revenge, toxic politics, or negative rhetoric. Our hope resides in bipartisanship…reaching across the aisle in solidarity for the greater good for all.

In these uncertain times, history has been recorded. It’s never been more important to be actively involved and civically engaged. The power to make positive community changes and connect people to one another is within us. With faith, hope, and empathy, we can heal the past to create a new vision of possibilities ensuring safety and success for every individual.

Character matters. Truth matters. Integrity matters. We ALL matter.

Congratulations to our 46th President and our first woman Vice-President. The American people are trusting in you and your cabinet. Please lead us with dignity, decency, and grace.

We are a TEAM. Together everyone achieves more.

The critical color for 2021 is purple. 

Breathe.

Blessings, gratitude, and healing,

Cynthia Brian

Founder/Executive Director

Be the Star You Are!®

PO Box 376

Moraga, California 94556

Cynthia@BetheStarYouAre.org

https://www.BetheStarYouAre.org

http://www.BTSYA.org

DONATE: https://www.paypal.com/fundraiser/charity/1504


THANK YOU FOR MAKING BTSYA A TOP NON PROFIT!

2020 GreatNonprofits TOP-RATED NonprofitBe the Star You Are!® has been honored with a Top-Rated Award for 2020 from GreatNonprofits with 5 STAR reviews! We appreciate all of your contributions! https://greatnonprofits.org/org/be-the-star-you-are-inc


A Path Towards Recovery

Angela Paramoshin with catAfter a few torturous days of awaiting the results from the 2020 presidential election, it has been announced that our new President is Joe Biden. Minutes after hearing the news, the streets were filled with cheering and screams of joy. The spirits of the people within our society were raised as they celebrated Biden’s electoral win.

Our nation’s path towards recovery has been long-awaited and we can only hope that it gets better from here on. We must continue to fight for the rights of our people, especially those who are in marginalized populations struggling to have their voices heard.

Although we have won this election together, it is only the first step towards healing the United States. As a society, we have to continue to spread love and peace in order to attain harmony at the end of our united path towards healing.

Angelica Paramoshin, a content creator volunteer with Be the Star You Are!® charity, is a rising senior in high school devoting time doing volunteering work in order to use her voice to help others. She is also now a cat mom!


Healing our World, One Kindness at a Time

Karen KitcKIf ever there was a time when kindness was needed to heal hearts, it is now.  Today we may be challenged by family members, friends, or people we don’t know to try to understand their viewpoints and feelings. How we respond speaks volumes about us.

We all have the option of taking the high road or the low road when faced with difficult situations. Simple acts of kindness, such as listening to opposite opinions, and expressing our belief in the value of all individuals, might bring us all to a higher ground.

Today I challenge you to post or send a kind message to an individual or organization to simply send good wishes.  Surprise someone with your reaching out. It doesn’t mean you agree with all they say or do, but you value them as human beings and wish them well.  Let’s give everyone a reason to smile today and continue to scatter some kindness tomorrow.

“It doesn’t matter who you voted for, where you stood before Election Day,” Mr. Biden said in short remarks in Delaware after meeting with members of a newly formed Covid-19 advisory board. “It doesn’t matter your party, your point of view. We can save tens of thousands of lives if everyone would just wear a mask for the next few months.” He added: “Not Democratic or Republican lives — American lives.”

Karen Kitchel who penned two chapters in the book, Be the Star You Are! Millennials to Boomers Celebrating Gifts of Positive Voices in a Changing Digital World, is the Kindness Coordinator volunteer with BTSYA. She serves meals to the homeless and is a volunteer teacher, writer, job coach, and mentor. www.scatteringkindness.com

Be the Reason to smile smile


HOLIDAY SHOPPING?

The holidays are approaching.To avoid exposure to coronavirus in stores, you may wish to shop on-line. We have suggestions for you to shop, save, and stay safe. Please use these web sites for all of your shopping essentials.

1. AmazonSmile donates .5% of purchases https://smile.amazon.com/ch/94-3333882

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2. Discounted books at Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/shops/be_the_star_you_are_charity

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3. Giving Assistant: Shop. Earn. Give! Use Giving Assistant to earn cash at 3500+ popular online stores :https://givingassistant.org/np#be-the-star-you-are-inc

4. Shop at over 1300 stores on IGIVE: http://www.iGive.com/BTSYA

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5. Buy “Read, Lead, Succeed” black tanks and books at StarStyle® Store: http://www.starstylestore.net/

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6. Are you a gamer, lover of new software, or other digital content? Buy all of your favorites at Humble Bundle. http://ow.ly/cYs130iN6n4


STAY SAFE! WEAR A MASK!

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BE UPLIFTED WITH BE THE STAR YOU ARE!® RADIO BROADCASTS

As part of our Be the Star You Are! Disaster Relief Outreach program (https://www.bethestaryouare.org/copy-of-operation-hurricane-disaste), StarStyle® Productions, LLC and Be the Star You Are!® are showcasing authors, artists, actors, poets, musicians, and many others, all of whom are out of work. We believe in supporting creativity that provides escape and joy, especially during tough times.

Tune in to StarStyle®-Be the Star You Are!® on Wednesdays at 4pm PT for “Wednesdays with Writers and Performers” LIVE http://www.voiceamerica.com/show/2206/be-the-star-you-are as well as our teen program, Express Yourself!™ airing on Sundays at 3pm PT for “Super Smart Sundays” https://www.voiceamerica.com/show/2014/express-yourself

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MAKE A DONATION TO OPERATION DISASTER RELIEF TO HELP SURVIVORS OF THE FIRES AND HURRICANES!


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PLEASE DONATE

Make a DONATION through PAYPAL GIVING FUND and PAYPAL with 100% going to BTSYA with NO FEES:  https://www.paypal.com/fundraiser/charity/1504

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United we stand. Divided we fall. 


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We are the United States of America
We honor the men and women of our United States Armed Forces on Veterans Day, November 11, 2020. Your dedicated service is greatly appreciated and valued. Thank you. Thank you. 
Hope, Healing, and the color purple.

Be the Star You Are!® 501 c3
PO Box 376
Moraga, California
94556
info@BetheStarYouAre.org
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Smile Secrets, Giving Thanks, Tragedy Talks for Kids By Cynthia Brian

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Empowerment
Smile Secrets, Giving Thanks, Tragedy Talks for Kids By Cynthia Brian

If you are looking for upbeat, life-changing, and mind stretching information, you’ve come to the right place. Host Cynthia Brian takes you on a journey of exploration that will encourage, inspire, and motivate you to make positive changes that offer life enhancing results. It’s party time on StarStyle®-Be the Star You Are!®. And YOU are invited! Join us LIVE 4-5pm Pt on Wednesdays or tune in to the archives at your leisure. Come play in StarStyle Country.

Want to look great, feel awesome, and be more attractive? Want to brighten the day of strangers, help people feel better, and be happier yourself? Trying smiling more.  Find the power that smiling offers and show your pearly whites!

When you affirm that the world is good and you recognize the sources of goodness are outside yourself, you’ll feel happier, healthier, and grateful. Set your intention to give thanks for everything you are and have. Cynthia Brian will help you appreciate the little things that matter.

When tragedies happen in the world or closer to home with family or friends, how do you explain the circumstances to your children? How many details are healthy to share and what needs to be left unsaid? We’ll explore this difficult topic while being an empathetic parent.

Listen at Voice America Network 

#StartWithaSmile at smile.amazon.com/ch/94-3333882 . Amazon donates to Be The Star You Are, Inc..

Read our BTSYA April Newsletter

What’s happening? Want to party? Visit our Event page

Make a DONATION through PAYPAL GIVING FUND

Catch up with all broadcasts on ITunes

Buy books by Cynthia Brian at http://starstyleradio.net/Store.html

For photos, descriptions, links, archives, and more, visit http://www.StarStyleRadio.com.
Get inspired, motivated, and informed with StarStyle®-Be the Star You Are!®
Lend us Your Ears!!!

Make a donation today to Be the Star You Are!® charity http://www.bethestaryouare.org

Cynthia Brian talks about the empowering outreach programs offered by Be the Star You Are!® charity. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHglz05pBvI&feature=youtu.be

Embed StarStyle® Be the Star You Are!® Radio
If you are a fan of the authors, experts, celebrities, and guests that appear regularly on StarStyle®-Be the Star You Are!® radio, you can now be sure to never miss an episode. Embed this code into your WordPress site or any site and you’ll always have Cynthia Brian, Heather Brittany, and all of your favorite pioneers on the planet at your fingertips.  Upbeat, positive, life-changing talk radio broadcasting live each week since 1998. Lend us Your Ears. We are Starstyle®-Be the Star You Are!®
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Be the Star You Are!® charity. Every Season is for Giving Make a donation today

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The Gift of Values By Cynthia Brian

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The Gift of Values By Cynthia Brian

The Gift of Values

Teens talk and the world listens every Tuesday NOON PT on the Voice America Kids Network. Produced by StarStyle® Productions, LLC and Cynthia Brian, these young adults know how to rock and express their unique views. Join the fun!

What are values?
The dictionary states that values are
the regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something. Or a person’s principles or standards of behavior; one’s judgment of what is important in life.
Host Maria Wong tackles the subject of values with personal perspectives as a teen who deciding on the next step towards college choices. Your values are things that you prioritize and think are important in defining your life and work. Maria interviews Robin Roe with her novel, A List of Cages, who has written a raw, emotional, powerful novel with a strong message of kindness. Robin discusses her writing process, how she writes, her love for her former students, and her upcoming novel. Maria provides a Book Smart segment about her all time favorite book, Kira Kira by Cynthia Kadohata, a book that shaped many of her personal values and helps readers reflect on how experiences, family, culture, and location shape one’s value system.
“If we are to go forward, we must go back and rediscover those precious values – that all reality hinges on moral foundations and that all reality has spiritual control”. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Value yourself! You have self worth!

·      Bio Robin Roe has a bachelor’s degree from Cornell University and a master’s from Harvard. She counseled adolescents in Boston before she moved to Dallas to run a mentoring program for at-risk teens.

Listen at Voice America Kids Network

#StartWithaSmile at smile.amazon.com/ch/94-3333882 and Amazon donates to Be The Star You Are, Inc..

Make a DONATION through PAYPAL GIVING FUND and PAYPAL with 100% going to BTSYA with NO FEES!

Read our BTSYA March Newsletter

Shop. Earn. Give! Use Giving Assistant to earn cash back at 1800+ popular online stores, then donate a percentage to BTSYA.

Listen to all broadcasts at ITUNES: https://itunes.apple.com/podcast/express-yourself!/id481894121?mt=2

Express Yourself! Teen Radio is produced by Cynthia Brian of Starstyle Productions, llc as an outreach program of Be the Star You Are! charity. To make a tax-deductible donation to keep this positive youth programming broadcasting weekly to international audiences, visit http://www.bethestaryouare.org/donate.htm. Dare to care!

For all the latest news on what teens are talking about on Express Yourself! Teen Radio embed this code into your blogs and web sites <Iframe src=”http://www.voiceamerica.com/jwplayer/HostPlayer.html?showid=2014″frameborder=”0″ scrolling=”auto” width=”420″ height=”380″></Iframe>

Be the Star You Are! charity. It’s ALWAYS the Season of Giving.  Make a donation today. http://www.bethestaryouare.org/donate.htm. Buy books and shirts at http://starstyleradio.net/Store.html .

Links you can use for Be the Star You Are!®
Positive Results
About Us 
Programs
How to Help 
Blog
Events
Contact us

What’s happening? Want to party? Visit our Event page: http://www.bethestaryouare.org/#!events/kgh2e

Talk 2: http://www.btsya.com/talk_2.html?r=20160628121151

Starstyle, Be the Star You Are, and Miracle Moments are registered trademarks of Cynthia Brian
Keywords: – – Robin roe, values, a list of cages , empathy, Cynthia kadohata, kira, kira ,be the star you are for millennials, communication, collaborating, motivation,express yourself, starstyle, be the star you are, Cynthia brian, voice America kids

No Good Card for This! By Cynthia Brian

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No Good Card for This! By Cynthia Brian

Teens talk and the world listens every Tuesday NOON PT on the Voice America Kids Network. Produced by StarStyle® Productions, LLC and Cynthia Brian, these young adults know how to rock and express their unique views. Join the fun!

Spring has sprung and a time to celebrate the re-birth of nature is upon us. Host Asya Gonzalez reads producer, Cynthia Brian’s article aptly titled Flower Fever that sets the tone for this program celebrating spring, empathy, and Easter. (http://www.cynthiabrian.com/gardening-articles) Author of There is No good Card for This, Kelsey Crowe adds to the conversation discussing her illustrated guide to effective compassion that takes you, step by step by step, past the paralysis of thinking about someone in a difficult time to actually doing something (or nothing) with good judgment instead of fear. Her empathy menu offers support with confidence, no matter the situation. In the final segment, Asya talks about her family traditions for spring including fun activities for an Easter or spring break filled with joy, adventure, and playfulness.

BIO: Kelsey Crowe, Ph.D. is the founder of Help Each Other Out. Crowe earned her doctorate in social welfare at the University of California, Berkley and teaches social work at California State University. Crowe’s first book, There Is No Good Card for This: What To Say and Do When Life Gets Scary, Awful, and Unfair To People You Love), coauthored with Emily McDowell.  Written in a how-to, relatable, we’ve-all-been-that-deer-in-the-headlights kind of way, There Is No Good Card for This isn’t a spiritual treatise on how to make you a better person or a scientific argument about why compassion matters. It is a helpful illustrated guide to effective compassion that takes you, step by step by step, past the paralysis of thinking about someone in a difficult time to actually doing something (or nothing) with good judgment instead of fear.
Crowe’s organization Help Each Other Out is a growing collective of people embracing the idea that being there for others is often easier than we think, it can be learned, and that it matters. Taking the principles found in There Is No Good Card for This along with her many years of experience in the field and organization, a presentation with Crowe is not one to miss. From universities to health care organizations, every audience member will walk away feeling inspired.
Currently, Crowe resides in San Francisco, California with her husband and daughter. She hopes for a day when no one has to suffer a personal trial alone because the people around them just didn’t know what to do or say. http://www.helpeachotherout.com

Listen at Voice America Kids Network

#StartWithaSmile at smile.amazon.com/ch/94-3333882 and Amazon donates to Be The Star You Are, Inc..

Make a DONATION through PAYPAL GIVING FUND and PAYPAL with 100% going to BTSYA with NO FEES!

Read our BTSYA March Newsletter

Shop. Earn. Give! Use Giving Assistant to earn cash back at 1800+ popular online stores, then donate a percentage to BTSYA: https://givingassistant.org/np#be-the-star-you-are-inc

Listen to all broadcasts at ITUNES: https://itunes.apple.com/podcast/express-yourself!/id481894121?mt=2

Express Yourself! Teen Radio is produced by Cynthia Brian of Starstyle Productions, llc as an outreach program of Be the Star You Are! charity. To make a tax-deductible donation to keep this positive youth programming broadcasting weekly to international audiences, visit http://www.bethestaryouare.org/donate.htm. Dare to care!

For all the latest news on what teens are talking about on Express Yourself! Teen Radio embed this code into your blogs and web sites <Iframe src=”http://www.voiceamerica.com/jwplayer/HostPlayer.html?showid=2014″frameborder=”0″ scrolling=”auto” width=”420″ height=”380″></Iframe>

Be the Star You Are! charity. It’s ALWAYS the Season of Giving.  Make a donation today. http://www.bethestaryouare.org/donate.htm. Buy books and shirts at http://starstyleradio.net/Store.html .

Links you can use for Be the Star You Are!®
Positive Results
About Us 
Programs
How to Help 
Blog
Events
Contact us

What’s happening? Want to party? Visit our Event page: http://www.bethestaryouare.org/#!events/kgh2e

Talk 2: http://www.btsya.com/talk_2.html?r=20160628121151

Starstyle, Be the Star You Are, and Miracle Moments are registered trademarks of Cynthia Brian

The Stress Solution By Dr. Paula Joyce

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7th Wave

Stress is not the problem. Whether we react or choose to respond to stress is the key to solving the problem. There is no denying that stress is high and actually increasing in the USA and throughout the world. What is surprising is that a recent survey found that 53% of Americans do not get support from their doctors to manage their stress yet about 70% of doctor visits are stress-related. On top of this, we know that stress hormones cause long-term health problems like a lowered immune system, cancer, heart disease, diabetes, weight gain, depression and anxiety. Just like stress is not the problem, medication is not the answer. We must get to the root of the problem and solve it. Otherwise, the damage to our bodies is still happening under the surface on a continuous basis. What’s amazing is that we can actually solve the stress problem with empathy, eliminating the negative stories that we tell ourselves and other empowering tools. Please join us Thursday to learn how to de-stress.

This image file may be used for publication in tghe book, "Curse of teh Capable..." and other related uses, such as internet or other electronic purposes, as well as brochures, business cards and other advertising purposes. Print copies must be ordered from Photographic Images 508-435-5534

Arthur P. Ciaramicoli, EdD, PhD, is a licensed clinical psychologist and the chief medical officer of Soundmindz.org, a popular mental health platform with 42,000 registered users and an annualized download rate of 150,000 for three apps Ciaramicoli has developed. Currently in private practice, he has been on the faculty of Harvard Medical School, chief psychologist of Metrowest Medical Center and lecturer for the American Cancer Society. He is the author of several books, including The Power of Empathy, Performance Addiction and Lasting Love, which is now published in 7 languages. His new book is The Stress Solution: Using Empathy and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to Reduce Anxiety and Develop Resilience. He lives in Massachusetts with his family. Please visit him at:

HOW TO LEAD WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM YOUR EMOTIONS by Hemda Mizrahi and Pat Baxter

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HOW TO LEAD WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM YOUR EMOTIONS by Hemda Mizrahi and Pat Baxter

Pat Baxter Head Shot VA

Pat Baxter, Ed.D., MS, CSA, author of “Cool Change: Turning Emotions Into Leadership Strengths,” joined me on “Turn the Page”  to discuss how emotions help us to be guided by our experiences, better manage relationships, and take productive action. Listen to our conversation about engaging the benefits, and minimizing the liabilities of expressing feelings at work.

The ability to regulate one’s emotions is an important marker of performing well in high-pressure situations. The more limber you are in responding to stress, the more access you’ll be granted to influence others.

Dr. Baxter expanded on our discussion after the show, by sharing additional tactics for constructively engaging emotions:

EMPATHY IS A CRITICAL SKILL IN BUILDING STRONGER RELATIONSHIPS.
Research shows that women are likely to have higher scores in certain Emotional Intelligence competencies (which can make them strong leaders!), especially empathy. Empathy is the ability to understand and relate to another’s feelings. Both empathy and emotional awareness are skills that can be learned. One of the most effective actions you can take to establish an empathetic relationship is to listen carefully and closely. When the person pauses or becomes quiet, repeat back what you heard (not word for word), using your own words to convey what you understood. Image Relationship Therapy, pioneered by Harville Hendrix, encourages the listener to then ask, “did I get it?” and “is there anything else?” This type of approach is foundational to coaching, counseling, and mediation given how supported, respected, and cared for the person speaking feels. It is a great strategy for deescalating a heated situation.

BEING EMOTIONALLY AWARE ENABLES YOU TO GET “UNSTUCK” IN YOUR EMOTIONS. Emotional awareness invites you to pinpoint the triggers and other factors that contribute to your emotions, and to be empowered by the insights that can liberate you from recurring traps. You also have the option to choose where you focus your attention. Instead of getting “stuck” feeling a certain way for days or longer, get unstuck by focusing on something you want to expand, like joy, peace, and confidence!

EMOTIONS ARE CONTAGIOUS.
Do you believe you can “catch” an emotion, as you would a cold? According to dictionary.com, “emotional contagion” is “the tendency to feel and express emotions similar to and influenced by those of others.” Recall a time when you were on a team or part of group that experienced a disappointment or a loss; how many of your fellow members felt the same way? Dr. Baxter suggests this tactic: Designate someone to help the group get unstuck by asking, “what good things have happened lately?” or “how can this situation help us?” This is precisely the tactic that research has shown distinguishes stress-resilient people from those who are prone to the adverse effects of stress (that is, those who view stress as helpful rather than “bad”).

KEEPING YOU ALIVE — AND FEELING ALIVE ARE THE GIFTS OF EMOTION.
Dr. Baxter advises, “Suppressing “bad” emotions, such as rage, fear, and sadness can function like a dam, and keep you from positives, like love and connection. Giving credence to your emotions can help to ensure your safety, health, and productivity.’

LEARN ABOUT THE LATEST RESEARCH ON EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE.
The Society of Emotional Intelligence (SoEI) hosts its annual global conference to share the must current research and practices related to emotional intelligence. SoEI also provides training and certification, which you can implement to enhance your organization’s success in areas such as engagement, selection, leadership development, sales training, and coaching.

Listen to our conversation, and read Dr. Baxter’s book to strengthen your leadership and personal effectiveness through the guidance of your emotions.

The Importance of Empathy

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7th Wave
The Importance of Empathy

empathy

Everyone deserves our empathy, even when, or more accurately, especially when they have harmed us. This is different from forgiveness. Empathy opens up the heart even wider because it is an aspect of love. It allows us to walk in another person’s shoes, to see and feel life from their perspective. It expands our humanity and enriches our life because we are able to give and receive more love. It allows us to heal the wounds that we have suffered at the hands of the wounded people who have been in our lives. As we let go of the pain, anger and negative emotions, we make more room for joy, happiness and love.

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Empathy: What it is and why it matters

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Empowerment
Empathy: What it is and why it matters

EmpathyCoverArtDavidHowe

David Howe – author of Empathy: What it is and why it matters – joins Lou Agosta on A Rumor of Empathy for a conversation about empathy. David begins with the idea that empathy humanizes people and their relationships. Empathy is about our shared humanity.
This includes but is bigger than the idea that an experience or feeling is communicated for the one person to the other. Without the other person, one loses one’s humanity. One is left without vitality, aliveness, or energy. In short, needs the other person to be fully alive.
When all is said and done, empathy makes us better and should be promoted in child, adults, and community. It is not that anyone else ever thought that empathy made us worse as persons. That would be silly. Yet Heinz Kohut emphasized the aspect of empathy as a scientific form of data gathering about other persons that is value neutral and precisely ambiguous as to its social relevance. As Kohut famously said, empathy is “vicarious introspection,” in which one has a vicarious experience of the other’s feeling as if one were in the theatre or cinema. Thus, accordingly empathy could be mis-used as exemplified by the “empathic” Nazi who used it the better to control, dominate, and manipulate the would-be victims. Such misfirings and misuses or empathy remain a risk – and a point of debate – and presumably motivate the need for the explicit development of positive empathy in children, adults, and the community. This raises the question of whether empathy can be taught at all. Howe definitely advocates trying. My thought in this regards runs along lines sketched out by Carl Rogers about psychotherapy in general. With a few exceptions, people are naturally empathic and have to be inhibited, limited, and constrained. Much of education teaches compliance, rule following, and conformity, not necessarily cooperation and individualism. Therefore, the “training” in adults consists in removing the inhibitions towards openness and communication, allowing the empathic tendencies to resume their natural unfolding and development. Resistance to empathy may seem counter-intuitive, yet is pervasive and a source of resignation and cynicism. In the cases of children, presumably education should be attentive the ways empathy is inhibited and suppressed in order to produce conformity and compliance where the latter are not really needed. By all means, keep one’s hands to oneself and respect boundaries. But be open to empathy in navigating across the boundaries between self and other in a way consistent with integrity and completeness. Speaking personally as the author of three books on empathy, this is the book that I wish I had written. I hasten to add that my own works are excellent and everyone should read them, too, but Howe provides an accessible read is also rigorous and that will be relevant to a general audience. When all is said and done, when all the diagnostic categories are attached and philosophical arguments completed, in empathy, one is simply in the presence of another human being.

 

Replay for this episode of “A Rumor of Empathy” is now Available on VoiceAmerica Empowerment Channel.

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