Rediscovering the Art of Connection in the Age of Technology
My passion is to help people better their lives by releasing their fears and blossoming into who they are meant to be. In my weekly radio show, Uplift Your Life, Nourishment of the Spirit, I share information and tools to help you make new healthier choices, heal physically, mentally and emotionally and become your authentic self. In my new blog, I’ll help you do this by sharing my tip of the week, a story to help you learn how to find the Silver Lining in every situation and a response from a listener, Marian Stephens, who is using the information in my radio show to change her life. Her first email to me impressed me so much that I invited her to be a regular part of my blog. This was Marian’s heartfelt response: “I have been longing for guidance and direction in life. Your show is powerful and I know there are so many like myself who will listen and change their lives. I feel honored that you want me to be a part of that experience. Thank you so much!” I hope we inspire you to listen to the show, read the blogs and change your life.
Dr. Paula’s Tip of the Week
This week my guest, Michael Gelb, and I discuss the importance of human connection and how to cultivate open and honest communication channels with family, friends, and co-workers. My tip of the week is a surefire way to begin finding the power of authentic connection.
The tip of the week comes from my e-book, 33 Tips for Self-Empowerment, I wrote this book because when you are self-empowered, you are connected to your limitless higher self, your soul, your intuition, your gut feelings, your guidance. Our limitless higher self is the wiser part of ourselves, the part that knows the Truth of who we are. Our logical mind is so loud, however, that it often drowns out the whisper that is trying to guide us on our authentic path. As you learn to listen to the still small voice within, you will begin to feel at peace. Because your limitless higher self has direct access to the Divine, it is through this connection that miracles occur, like unexpected healing, healthy relationships, peace and wealth. This connection gives you an inner foundation of love, which eliminates fear. It is through this love that you can heal the planet and yourself and make the shift into the 4th dimension. Our higher self helps us find safety and even save our own life and others’ lives. We must train ourselves to trust our higher self and never go against it. Don’t talk yourself out of something that feels right to you or let what others say or think influence what you do. Please use these tips. My Tip for this week is in honor of our topic today. If you’re working on releasing your anger, for instance, ask yourself: Is the intensity of my anger diminished? Is the duration of my anger shorter? Is my recovery time faster? Is the amount of time between angry outbursts greater?
When you’re changing a behavior, whether it’s adjusting how you use technology, connect with others or let go of destructive habits like anger, blame, shame, judgment, etc., it’s important to notice small changes along the way. Give yourself credit for your progress . . . And celebrate your victories!
This is important because our minds tend to focus on what is still missing, what we’re not doing right and how we’re not perfect. This negative energy robs us of the joy of our progress, steals our hope and makes us believe that we’ll never achieve our goals. Monitoring our progress is a powerful way to counteract this tendency. We are in charge of our thoughts and have the ability to kick out the ones that hurt us. Since our thoughts carry a frequency, it is important that we stay as positive as we can. The higher vibration will attract more of the same, which will build our positive energy and create more good things in our personal and professional lives. Whether you are a designated leader or not, your energy affects everyone around you. Make sure that you are spreading positive energy. As we change ourselves, we change everyone who comes in contact with us, even people who just pass us on the street. In this way, each one of us is a leader, a piece of the puzzle, part of the one mind that will help to heal the world and help it become the world we want to live in. What you think, say and do matters.
Dr. Paula’s Silver Lining Story
Intimate connection with one another is more important than ever. Electronics, social media, texting, google, Wikipedia, and many other Internet spots are luring our attention away from face to face or voice to voice communication. In my story today, I share my own challenges with social media and email.
I must admit that I was a little slow getting into cell phone technology. I’m fully in it now, though. Initially, I had to learn to text if I wanted to communicate with my children. Then I added social media for business purposes. It was fine, until one night I noticed that I had gotten a little too far into it. Without wanting to, I was checking my social media every few minutes. That’s when I put the phone out of reach and turned off the alerts. I stopped using social media for a few days to break the pattern that had over-taken me, and I never turned alerts back on. Now I choose when I want to go on social media and I only use it to fulfill my mission of uplifting people’s lives, including my own. I blocked people who were using social media to spread mean spirited posts, I deleted any comments on my posts that were rude or inappropriate, and I encouraged others to do the same. Sometimes I take time off from social media if I’m particularly tired or busy or just not wanting to do it. Other times I spend extra time because I need uplifting and the posts make me laugh or nurture my soul. I don’t follow a time pattern. I follow my internal guidance because it never steers me wrong.
Technology is not good or bad. How we use it determines its value, and we all have choices in that regard. Although technology often saves me time, I’m old fashioned about the value of more personal communication. Sometimes, I use text to set a phone appointment, which I consider to be second to face to face communication. But skype or a personal visit isn’t always possible. Emails and text are efficient and helpful at times, but they don’t convey tone or the warmth of a voice or smile and they can be easily misunderstood. I remember having crafted a difficult email to someone with great care only to discover from a third party that the person had completely misinterpreted my message. A phone conversation would have given me the opportunity to pick up on the miscommunication and solve it before it grew.
I have learned a lot from people younger than me about the value of technology. I have also learned to be discerning about when I use it and to not throw away what I know about the value of personal connection for healthy communication.
Marian Stephen’s Story
When I received the following email from Marian, I was so impressed with her self-awareness, openness to change and willingness to take the ideas in my radio show and apply them to her own life that I invited her to do this blog with me. We hope this will help you create the life you want.
Today’s show reflected the theme of an ongoing conversation that I have with my new husband, Rob. We have a desire to deepen our connection. We share a very strong connection and I have found that it has led to a greater sense of self awareness and a wish to express myself creatively. What we have been searching for is the language to express what a deep connection looks like and the tools needed to achieve it. I know working with you and your team is going to provide me with the answers I have been seeking. I want to define my spiritual path in order to express myself through the written word and tell the story of my parenting journey. Applying some of the concepts outlined in today’s episode will also help strengthen my relationships with my family – these relationships are the foundation on which I am building the practices needed for the lifestyle I want.
Tonight I am going to try the technique you suggested in a previous show of lighting the candles and writing down the questions I have. I know I should trust my intuition, but still disregard that quiet voice that speaks to me despite knowing it is true. My oldest son has special needs and I am struggling with what next steps to take with him. I find myself stuck in a negative thought cycle that has left me feeling unable to act. I’ll get a glimpse of what I need to do, then the ideas become elusive.
The question, “How might I respond if I were not taking this personally?” is one that I need to ask myself throughout the day. I have sincere difficulty not being overly sensitive. I find that it impacts my ability to effectively listen to what is even being said. I also find myself defensive which is leading to speaking angrily and shutting down. I want to communicate in positive ways and practicing asking this will be very helpful.
The segment about defining the purpose of goals resonated with me because I think being aware of the purpose will help define the steps needed to achieve the goals. If I am aware of the meaning of the actions, I think I am more likely to put a great deal of effort into working on my goals. Keeping the purpose in the forefront of my mind would help to define and reach various ideals.
It does require vulnerability to build an authentic connection which is why I sometimes rely on technology, or distract myself with electronic devices. It can be momentarily more comfortable than being open to having what I perceive to be a difficult conversation. But, it leaves me craving closeness and that sense of connection that makes me feel heard and understood.
For More Shows on Connection
Listen to the following radio shows:
Create Change by Making Compassionate Life Affirming Choices with Stephan Schwartz
Listening With an Open Heart with Stephan Beyer
A Simple Solution for Loneliness with Kira Asatryan
FREE CHAPTER, THE ULTIMATE CREATIVE PROBLEM SOLVING PROCESS, FROM MY BEST-SELLING BOOK, “NOTHING BUT NET”
To learn more about my unique process that removes hidden blockages, unleashes your creativity and helps you solve your most challenging problems, click here to sign up for my newsletter and receive the chapter as my gift: http://paulajoyce.com/wpsite/newsletter-sign-up/