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The Eldercare Advocate: A Calmer You; A Path to A Healthier You

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Empowerment
The Eldercare Advocate: A Calmer You; A Path to A Healthier You

A calmer mind can help you respond to stressful situations in a way that is less harmful to your body. There is even research which indicates that the stress one experiences may play a role in one’s hair turning gray

There is evidentiary research that becoming calmer and achieving inner peace has powerful benefits on overall health and wellness. There are many ways and practices to help on the path to achieving an improved level of calm but one of the simplest is breathing.

Breathing is an autonomic nervous system response that is controlled by the respiratory center in an area at the base of the brain. We do not have to consciously control our breathing; it is an involuntary function. However, that doesn’t mean we don’t have the ability to control it. We actually CAN control our breathing. In doing so we can use it as a valuable tool to reduce feelings of stress and anxiety which in turn can help us feel more calm. Thus, breathing exercises can be beneficial to your mental and physical wellbeing.

There are even those that believe that merely being around a person who has achieved inner peace can have a positive impact on their own mood or level of calm. This is reflected in the statement: “the tension was so thick you can cut it with a knife”. This implies that that one is able to feel the tension in the environment which can cause a heightened response in our own body and influence our behavior. Thus, it stands to reason, that being around a person who is more calm can help inspire a feeling of calm within ourselves.

There are a variety of breathing techniques that you can practice to help you achieve a greater feeling of inner calm or peace.

1.  Abdominal or diaphragmatic breathing is the basis of all breathing exercises. Did you ever notice that when a baby sleeps their abdomen moves up and down? Did you ever notice that when you are laying down, in the most relaxed position, when you breathe your abdomen goes up and down.This is because this is how the body’s optimal brething functioning. It is the deepest form of breathing, when the most breath completely fills our lungs and every cell in our body becomes oxygenated.

To begin, sit down in a comfortable position, put one hand on your chest and the other on your belly. Take a deep breath in through your nose. If done correctly the diaphragm will inflates fully so that air goes to completely fill the our triangle shaped lungs all the way to their base. The breath should push the hand on the stomach out, while the other hand on the chest does not move. Try setting aside time 10 minutes each day to using this technique to take six to ten slow, deep breaths per minute for approximately ten minutes. You may experience immediate benefits such as a reduced heart rate and/or blood pressure level. After regularly practicing this for six to eight weeks you may see other advantages. This technique can beneficial if utilized prior to stress causing events.

2.  A Basic Calming Breath involves initially taking a long, slow breath in through your nose, first filling your lower lungs, then your upper lungs, holding the breath for a count of “three” and then slowly exhaling through pursed lips while you simultaneously think about relaxing the muscles of your face, jaw, shoulders and stomach.

3.  Dr. Andrew Weil, the founder and director of the University of Arizona Center for Integrative Medicine, is a proponent of the 4-7-8 breathing technique also known as “relaxing breath”. The technique is as follows: breathe in for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 7 seconds and exhale for 8 seconds. Focusing on long deep controlled breaths in a specific rhythm is also a core practice of many meditation and yoga practices which also promote relaxation. The scientific evidence supporting this technique is limited; however, individual people have reported that achieving this type of rhythmic breathing has helped them reduce anxiety thereby creating a sense of relaxation which leads to sleep. Achieving an inner calm obviously helps us in reducing our anger responses as well. How many times have we heard the expression “count to 10’ before we respond. This is meant to serve the same purpose. Paired with purposeful, controlled breathing, this can go a long way to helping us achieve inner calm and respond more favorably to a variety of challenging situations that we all face whether in our personal or work lives/environments.

4.  Alternate Nostril breathing is a yogic practice of breath control which has been demonstrated to be beneficial. In 2016, Vogue magazine declared “Breathing Is the New Yoga”, which is the primary technique in the Art of Living’s Happiness Program known as Sudarshan Kriya which we know as meditation. There are over 65 independent studies which show that Sudarshan Kriya is effective in reducing levels of the stress hormone cortisol, increases mental focus, enhances levels of immunity and decreases depression and anxiety, with quick and lasting effects.

In Sanskrit, Alternate Nostril Breathing is called Nadi Shodhana Pranayama, which translated means “subtle energy clearing breathing technique”. Alternate Nostril Breathing helps calm the mind, reduce anxiety, and bring a feeling of relaxation to the entire body. If performed for just a few minutes, Alternate Nostril Breathing can instantly reduce stress and fatigue, but can also be used to reduce stress before high-stress situations such as job interviews, performances or public speaking events. Some people describe the burst of energy they feel from alternate nostril breathing as similar to the jolt they get after drinking a cup of coffee. This can help you achieve a heightened sense of awareness or help you to be more focused.

Though alternate nostril breathing can be done as part of or is integral to it can also be done as its own practice to help quiet and still your mind. This technique may be helpful for caregivers who can use it to help manage the stresses that often accompany being in that role. You may also find that practicing alternate nostril breathing helps you to be more mindful of the present moment.

An overview of the procedure:

·  Sit in a comfortable position with the spine long and the hips relaxed. Release any tension from your jaw. Close your eyes.

·  Take a deep breath in

·  On an exhalation, take your index finger and close the right nostril and breathe out through the left nostril.

·  Then without moving your finger, breathe in through the left nostril.

·  Then release that finger and take your opposite hand and use your index finger to close the left nostril.

·  Then breathe out through the right nostril.

·  Then Inhale through the right nostril. Release the finger on your left nostril, close the right nostril with your index finger of the opposite hand and breathe out through your left nostril.

·  Repeat the process.

·  These two full breaths are called one round of Alternate Nostril Breath.

·  Perform 5 to 9 rounds of this alternating breath between the nostrils.

·  Remember to always inhale through the same nostril you just exhaled through.

It may take a few tries before you get the coordination of inhaling, exhaling and moving your fingers back and forth between nostrils. This is not unusual so try not to get frustrated. Keep at it and you’ll get it.

Additional interesting information about alternate nostril breathing:

There was a study completed in that found that people who practiced alternate nostril breathing lowered their perceived stress levels.

Yogic breathing practices are also believed to improve lung function and respiratory endurance. This was based on a small study done in 2017 in which the effects of pranayama practice on the lung functions of competitive swimmers was found that it had a positive effect on respiratory endurance.

We know the benefits that lowering your heart rate can have on cardiovascular health. According to a study completed in 2006, engaging in a slow yogic breath such as alternative nostril breathing significantly decreased heart rate and average breathing rhythm. Research from a 2011 study found that an alternative nostril breathing program performed over a period of six weeks had a positive impact on physical and physiological fitness-based performance. The breathing technique was found to have a positive influence on blood pressure, heart rate, and vital capacity.

Additional studies found that different types of yogic breathing could have beneficial effects on neurocognitive, respiratory and metabolic functions as well as  on the nervous system.

Though safe for most people, there are medical conditions in which alternate nostril breathing may be contraindicated. (i.e., COPD, asthma, other heart or lung conditions) In the event you have any of those conditions or concerns, you should consult with your doctor to find out if it is safe for you to practice alternate nostril breathing. As with any other practice, if you experience any adverse affects, such as shortness of breath, lightheadedness, dizziness or nausea while using this technique, you should discontinue immediately.

Life can be stressful for everyone at times. Daily life events, professional and family responsibilities, personal and professional relationships, taking on new roles as a parent, caregiving for a loved one, serious life changing events or medical conditions, the list goes on and on. There is a difference between the stress from immediate short-term situations in which the body releases hormones that are part of a normal physiologic response so it goes into a heightened state of alert so it can react as in the fight or flight response. (i.e., increased breathing and heart rates) That is entirely normal.

However, stress reactions to a variety of other situations can be harmful to our health. Symptoms associated with that type of stress may include anxiety, irritability, depression, insomnia, headaches, muscle pain or tension, fatigue, sleep problems, and changes in general behavior.

Too much stress can also negatively impact general habits and behaviors. It can lead us to make poor food choices and leads to poor exercise habits. Stress can either increase or reduce appetite, most often it increases appetite and the food choices we make under stress tend to be of the more unhealthy variety, sweeter, fattier, higher calorie foods.. Psychologists have related eating to the stressed individual’s need of some manner of control over situations as well as deriving pleasure or some form of comfort.  Professionals have been known to liken eating to smoking; smokers tend to smoke more cigarettes when feeling stressed just as as individuals eat more under the same circumstances. Individuals also tend to feel fatigue or weariness with chronic stress.

Conscious breathing can help you find an inner peace and help you defend against daily frustrations and stress   Once you select a method that is right for you and begin to practice it regularly, not only  in “times of trouble” as the Beatles Song,  you’ll most likely experience a shift in how you are feeling, especially if feeling stress and frustration has been like a constant but unwanted “friend”. You might notice that you’ve become a little more resilient, and approach a variety of situations with a greater sense of peace and relaxation, are less fatigued at the end of the day, have more restful and peaceful sleep and therefore awaken with more energy  and find others responding to you in a more pleasant manner.

Listen to the Jan. 27. 2020  episode of Voices for Eldercare Advocacy  on the Voice America Empowerment Channel for the interview on finding inner peace with someone who has achieved this in his life and helped many others achieve the same by teaching meditation over the past 15 years.

https://www.voiceamerica.com/show/3911/voices-for-eldercare-advocacy

 

Kristen Harper will be speaking at Arizona Pinners Conference on the “Top Ways to Reduce Stress” in Scottsdale, Arizona November 9, 2018

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Health & Wellness
Kristen Harper will be speaking at Arizona Pinners Conference on the “Top Ways to Reduce Stress” in Scottsdale, Arizona November 9, 2018

Please attend Kristen Harper’s speech on November 9, 2018 (Friday) at the Arizona Pinners Conference in Scottsdale, Arizona at 6:30pm on the “Top Ways to Reduce Stress.”

 

Kristen Harper is a Health and Wellness Speaker who inspires audiences to get healthy and stay healthy.  She is also  the radio show host for Tips to Keep You Healthy, Happy, and Motivated on VoiceAmerica.com every Tuesday at 3pm Pacific Time.

 

You can purchase tickets for the event at https://az.pinnersconference.com/  Free Foot Reflexology Rollers as Giveaways during Kristen’s speech!

 

Kristen Harper’s speaking website:  https://www.kristenharperspeaks.com/

 

Tips to Keep You Healthy, Happy, and Motivated radio show:  https://www.voiceamerica.com/show/2687/tips-to-keep-you-healthy-happy-and-motivated  Health and Wellness experts, Celebrities, Influencers, authors, researchers, and doctors have been interviewed on Kristen Harper’s radio show.

Kristen Harper will be speaking at the International Esthetics, Cosmetics, and Spa Conference in Las Vegas, Nevada on the Top Ways to Reduce Stress on June 24, 2018 at 1:45pm

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Health & Wellness
Kristen Harper will be speaking at the International Esthetics, Cosmetics, and Spa Conference in Las Vegas, Nevada on the Top Ways to Reduce Stress on June 24, 2018 at 1:45pm

Kristen Harper small jpg.jpg

 

Kristen Harper will be speaking June 24, 2018 at 1:45pm at the International Esthetics, Cosmetics, and Spa Conference in Las Vegas, Nevada on the Top Ways to Reduce Stress.  You can purchase tickets at: https://www.iecsc.com/

 

Kristen Harper is a Health and Wellness Speaker.  She inspires audiences to keep Healthy, Happy, and Motivated.

Transformational Time & Project Management Tips

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Empowerment
Transformational Time & Project Management Tips

Transformational Time & Project Management Tips

By Ariel & Shya Kane

Transformational Time & Project Management Tips

We have a client who asked us how she can improve her relationship with time and accomplish the things she wants to do in her life – work, projects in her apartment, errands and creative projects, as well as socializing – without feeling that she is wasting or running out of time. These are five suggestions we offered that supported her, and will support you, in easily and effortlessly managing your time and being effective and productive in your life.

1. There is time for everything that needs to be done…and there will always be things left to do.

What are you devoting your time to each day? We bet you think about what you want to do and whether or not you like the tasks at hand. Hint: Thinking about whether you want to do something or not is just a waste of time. Thinking about whether you like it or not is also a waste of time. Many people drag their feet going about what they are going to do anyway and then get no satisfaction from the activities they engage in as a result. A whole-hearted engagement in whatever you are doing will bring with it satisfaction as a by-product. And at the end of the day, there will always be more to do than can be done. We are often delighted by what we accomplish in a day and respectful of the fact that “tomorrow is another day” and that we will be rested and rejuvenated to begin again.

2. Honesty is key.

If you actually want to take control of your relationship with time, don’t tell yourself that you are going to do something that you have no intention of doing. There are things that you don’t want to do that you tell yourself that you “should” do. There are also things that you pretend to want to do that you don’t actually plan on doing or want to do at all.

For example, many times people have the idea that they would be better if…they lose weight, balance their checkbooks, exercise more, do creative things, etc. But that doesn’t mean that they are actually going to do any of those things. This list is simply something held in reserve so that you never give yourself a break and as a constant reminder that you need to change or fix something about yourself. This list is comprised of things that are not actually “in the works,” they are things that you are resisting doing – and by now anyone who is familiar with our approach knows that: What you resist persists, grows stronger, takes longer (or never gets done) and dominates your life. As an alternative, try this:

When you are hanging out – do that.
When you are doing a project – do that.

If you want to have control in your life, then do what you are doing in the current moment, rather than think about what you ought to be doing. Otherwise there is no actual rest because when you are doing nothing you think you should be doing something. If you actually rest then you are likely to find yourself energized to do things rather than talking to yourself about doing them.

3. Procrastination is a sophisticated word for “no”.
Don’t fix it – pay attention.

There is a false idea about independence that was formed in most of our minds around age two when we realized that we could disagree or say “no.” According to this immature notion we think that we are being independent by saying no to anything we are asked to do. In fact, for many of us, we registered in our undeveloped minds that we were powerful, got attention and had the world chasing us around, by doing the opposite of what was asked for and “Poof,” a life strategy is born. Over time we sophisticate this “no” to requests made of us and then when we say no to our own desires, we call it “procrastination”.

You don’t have to make a resolution to stop procrastinating – simply bring awareness to how often you say “no” to yourself and to all of the requests made upon you by life. When your bed is unmade, for instance, it is as if there is a request for you to make it, or to do the dishes, or answer the phone. Become aware of the resistance, hesitation, “don’t wannas” and see how often this is a part of your daily internal conversation. “No” is not a bad thing. It just is. With awareness (a non-judgmental seeing or noticing of how you operate) you can see what YOU want to do rather than be dictated by the life strategy of a two-year-old.

4. What is your current way of relating to time saving you from?

Often “problems” are solutions in disguise. Procrastination may actually be saving you from something you consider confronting or acting as a buffer between you and possible rejection, for instance. For example, you may say that you want more time to “socialize.” It is possible that the endless list of to-dos can keep you from having to get up online on a dating site or get out there and date. Or perhaps you have a creative project on your desk. Then day-to-day minutia that seems to eat your time each day can save you from having to get started. Right now, your incompletions define your life. If you lost them, you wouldn’t know who you are. Your comfort zone INCLUDES all of the things that you find uncomfortable. If you had no problems, nothing wrong, nothing that is holding you back…hmmm…then what?

5. Start small… and keep going.

You don’t have to look far to shift from a conversation about your life to living it in real time. Just lift your eyes from this article and look around. We bet you will see something to be done or something that begs for attention. You don’t have to do something big, start small: Bring a cup to the sink, dust a surface, make that call, file that item…and then keep going. Direct action, direct result. No problem. Complete those things in your life that are incomplete such as projects or organizing your closet. A simple way to approach many things is to repair or get rid of anything that is broken or have it fixed. Stop putting off what you know you are going to do anyway – like Nike says – Just do it!

Join Ariel & Shya for Transformational Time & Project Management in NYC

Dates: Saturday & Sunday, April 28 & 29, 2018
Time: 9:45am – 6pm both days
Fee: $649 (partial scholarships available)
Location: Skyline Hotel, 725 Tenth Ave. at 49th Street, Penthouse Ballroom, NYC

REGISTER

Since 1987, internationally acclaimed authors, seminar leaders, radio show hosts and business consultants Ariel and Shya Kane have acted as guides, leading people through the swamp of the mind into the clarity and brilliance of the moment. Find out more about the Kanes, their seminars in NYC, in the UKGermany and Costa Rica, the Say YES to Your Life! Meetups their work has inspired, their Being Here radio show or join their email newsletter. Also get information about their award-winning books.  Their newest book, Practical Enlightenment, is now available on Amazon.com.

Helping Those Who Have Experienced Disasters

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Variety
Helping Those Who Have Experienced Disasters

The 2018-03-08 episode will dig a bit deeper into how disasters impact our behaviors and ongoing responses to traumatic situations. We’ll talk with Clinical Psychologist Dr. Rickey Miller, who will discuss the various ways in which people respond to situations and how we can help people overcome their anxieties and stresses related to the disasters they have experienced or witnessed. Many organizations will have emergency response plans to address evacuations and basic employee safety concerns. This episode will take BCM professionals to a deeper level and provide insight on other topics that may need to be addressed in their employee plans to ensure ongoing support for employees when faced with traumatic situations.fullick-Promo-Variety.jpg

Dealing with Stress Like Your Life Depends On It

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Business
Dealing with Stress Like Your Life Depends On It

It seems that we all spend an enormous amount time trying to avoid what we feel. Every other commercial on TV or the Internet is designed to take us away from what is happening to us. Have a headache? Take this. Overwhelmed? Talk to your doctor about this new medication. Stressed? Get away to our great vacation destination. But everyone of these strategies are about avoiding what is happening to us. Although some avoidance can be a positive exercise, we can’t get away from everything that stresses us out. So, what are we supposed to do?

When we allow ourselves to pay attention to what is happening, both internally and externally, it gives us the ability to look at things in a new way. If we get curious about the sensations in our body, our thoughts and judgments going through our head, the emotions we feel, and the environment these all exit in, we can assess what is happening vs. just reacting to it. That pause, to key into ourselves, allows us to make decisions about what is needed in the moment.

One of the problems I often see is that we know what we need (to eat, to rest, to play, to be creative) but we deny ourselves these things because there are always more pressing things to do. We focus on the “to do” list and we become so enslaved to it that we put taking care of ourselves last on that list every time. We begin to glean our self-worth from how much me do and how productive we are. We wear our exhaustion like a badge of honor becoming “Human Doings” instead of “Human Beings.”

I still remember a time when we went to work from 9-5. When we arrived home, we did not engage in our work again until the next day. There was time for recreation, time for family, time of hobbies, time to just play with the kids and time to rest. But, our 21st century lives don’t work that way. We are expected to be available to our jobs nights, weekends, and holidays. There is no break because the workday never ends. And the things that are designed to keep us resilient get pushed aside.

As we continue to operate this way, is it any wonder that stress related illness is out of control? Our bodies can only take so much before they will let us know they are at the breaking point. Ignoring the signs can make us literally sick, or worse.

I believe that getting clear about what is happening to us is not just something helpful to do, but vital to our health, well-being, and ultimately our survival. It is not optional any more. We must cultivate things in our lives that gives us resiliency to combat the stress we encounter every day. Those things can include rest, creativity, music, meditation, yoga, sport, recreation, nature, pets, volunteerism, and activism. When we make time in our lives for the things that matter, that things that are difficult get better. It is a practice, like any other Mindfulness practice. But without it, the stress of our lives can overtake us and rob us of any joy in our lives, leaving us resentful and bitter.

It is so important. Make the time. It is not optional. Engage in it like your life depends on it, because it does!

Overcoming Family Feuds, College GE’s, Transplanted By Cynthia Brian

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Empowerment
Overcoming Family Feuds, College GE’s, Transplanted By Cynthia Brian

 

If you are looking for upbeat, life-changing, and mind stretching information, you’ve come to the right place. Host Cynthia Brian takes you on a journey of exploration that will encourage, inspire, and motivate you to make positive changes that offer life enhancing results. It’s party time on StarStyle®-Be the Star You Are!®. And YOU are invited!

Join us LIVE 4-5pm Pt on Wednesdays or tune in to the archives at your leisure. Come play in StarStyle Country. In this empowering book, Dr. Maisel shows how to stay sane when family isn’t, providing practical strategies that can be implemented immediately.  Overcoming Your Difficult Family is a “field guide” to common types of dysfunctional families, and a big helping of real life success stories that are dinner table tested and approved. Listeners will learn to maintain inner peace in the midst of family chaos and maybe even create a better life for the whole family.

When determining what college you want to attend, do you pay attention to the general education requirements?  Colleges want well-rounded students, but sometimes those GE’s seem to hold you back from your major. What to do? You have choices. When plants, trees, and shrubs are moved, they also go through an instance of distress. It doesn’t matter if they are being moved from one part of the garden to another or across the continent to a new home, as directors of our landscapes, we have a responsibility to give the transplants a good foundation for their new environs.  Tips for lessening plant stress.

Bio: Eric Maisel, PhD, is a retired family therapist, an active life coach, and the author of more than fifty books including his latest, Overcoming Your Difficult Family. He has been quoted or featured in a variety of publications, including Martha Stewart Living, Redbook, Glamour, Men’s Health, the San Francisco Chronicle, and Self. He lives in the San Francisco Bay Area. Visit him online at www.EricMaisel.com.

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Drama is Optional By Ariel & Shya Kane

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Drama is Optional By Ariel & Shya Kane

June 21: Drama is Optional You have been pre-programmed to get upset and emotional when things don’t go your way. What if all the drama in your life is of your own making? Challenging situations don’t have to result in suffering but when you say “No!” to how your life is unfolding, you create a life full of pain. Join Ariel and Shya in Being Here and realize that Drama is Optional. Callers welcome at Tel# 1-888-346-9141 Listen Live this Wednesday, June 21st at 9am PST / 12pm EST on the VoiceAmerica Empowerment Channel.

After this Wednesday, you can stream or download this episode and over 500 episodes on a wide variety of topics from our archives here: http://www.transformationmadeeasy.com/being-here-radio-show-archives/ You can also listen to Being Here on the go! Stream or download new and archived episodes to your smart phone or mobile device with these applications:

Podcasts app for iPhone

Stitcher Podcast app for Any Device

VoiceAmerica app for Apple 

VoiceAmerica app for Android

Oh NO! Here I Go Again! By Ariel & Shya Kane

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Empowerment
Oh NO! Here I Go Again! By Ariel & Shya Kane

June 7: Oh NO! Here I Go Again! It’s natural to think “Oh NO!” when you recognize that you are getting upset. Being upset is not a flaw or failing. However, when you simply see yourself without judgement, upsets can dissolve in an instant. Tune in to this enlightening episode of Being Here and watch those upsets go “Poof!” Callers welcome at Tel# 1-888-346-9141! Listen Live this Wednesday, June 7th at 9am PST / 12pm EST on the VoiceAmerica Empowerment Channel: http://www.transformationmadeeasy.com/being-here-radio-show/ After this Wednesday, you can stream or download this episode and over 500 episodes on a wide variety of topics from our archives here: http://www.transformationmadeeasy.com/being-here-radio-show-archives/ You can also listen to Being Here on the go! Stream or download new and archived episodes to your smart phone or mobile device with these applications:

– Podcasts app for iPhone

Stitcher Podcast app for Any Device

VoiceAmerica app for Apple 

VoiceAmerica app for Android

Being Stress-Free is Simple By Ariel & Shya Kane

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Being Stress-Free is Simple By Ariel & Shya Kane

Being Stress-Free is Simple, an excerpt from Practical Enlightenment
By Ariel & Shya Kane

People are born into cultures that have stress as an expected component to the gestalt of the culture itself, so it is part of their cultural download. While many people do things to reduce stress, such as yoga, meditation or exercise, most of them never stop to take a look at the mechanics of how it is produced. For those who do question what produces stress, the answer they come up with is usually inaccurate as it points to circumstances outside of oneself as the cause.

Experiencing stress in day-to-day life is not caused by circumstances. Stress happens when you say “no” to what is happening in your current circumstances. For instance, if you are in the midst of doing something and the phone rings and you think of it as an interruption or intrusion, you will immediately feel stressed. Stress also comes from the need to be right that things should be different than they are. In the previous example, you are right that the phone shouldn’t be ringing and that the caller is disturbing you. Stress happens when you think the moment isn’t perfect as it is. It happens when you are trying to get somewhere rather than be where you are, as if getting somewhere is better than being here. It happens when you manipulate the circumstances to get what you think you want. Stress also happens when you are not being honest about something – when you are doing things that are outside of your own integrity.

There are three simple ideas that are a great support structure, that allow you to re-center yourself when you find yourself stressed or when life seems to be operating against you. We call them The three Principles of Instantaneous Transformation. Why we call them “instantaneous” is that in the moment you identify where you are without judging yourself, you are already back centered – in an instant. It doesn’t take time. It takes the willingness to discover where you are and how you are being, while giving up being right about what got you there. It takes giving up blaming yourself or others. The three principles are great tools that allow you to regain your equilibrium when you find yourself stressed.
Let’s define these three principles and talk about them in relationship to stress.

The First Principle of Instantaneous Transformation:
What you resist persists and grows stronger.

Resisting a situation is like exercising a muscle because resistance makes a muscle stronger. It also makes unwanted situations, emotions, or conditions stronger. In effect, the act of resisting something keeps it in place. When you resist something you have to push against it. And when you push against it, you get stuck to it so you can’t let it go. Not wanting something to be the way it is, wishing things were different, trying to “get over” something, are all forms of resistance. They are also versions of saying No to the way your life is unfolding.

The Second Principle of Instantaneous Transformation:
No two things can occupy the same you at the same time.

When you are focused on something, everything else falls away. For example, we were once walking down a hill when we came upon a thorny rose bush that extended over the sidewalk. We paid attention as we walked past it so we wouldn’t get snagged. On our return trip up the hill, we noticed that on the road, right in front of that rose bush was a large truck with a horse trailer attached. We hadn’t noticed it on the way down the hill and by the amount of pollen that had gathered on the windshield, it was clear that it had been parked there for some time. Earlier, when we were consumed with the bush, we didn’t see the truck and trailer even though it was so close we could have reached out and touched it. And so it is with stress. Sometimes people are so consumed with stressors, they miss the rest of the world even though it is within reach.

The Third Principle of Instantaneous Transformation:
Anything you allow to be, allows you to be.

Let’s go back to the first principle: Anything you resist persists and grows stronger. If you remove your focus from what you don’t like, don’t want or wish to be different and bring your attention neutrally back to what’s in front of you, in that instant you’re free. Stress-free. Yup, it’s that simple. If you want to be “right” about someone else being “wrong,” then guess what? You get stress, stress and more stress and in truth, you are stressing yourself. Being stress-free is as simple as being where you are without disagreeing with your life circumstances, or saying “no” when life does not meet your preferences.

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Since 1987, internationally acclaimed authors, seminar leaders, radio show hosts and business consultants Ariel and Shya Kane have acted as guides, leading people through the swamp of the mind into the clarity and brilliance of the moment. Find out more about the Kanes, their seminars in NYC, in the UK, Germany and Costa Rica, the Say YES to Your Life! Meetups their work has inspired, their Being Here radio show or join their email newsletter. Also get information about their award-winning books. Their newest book, Practical Enlightenment, is now available on Amazon.com.

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